Archive for December 2007

The Reawakening

December 30, 2007

When you said that,
I knew, you had reasons.
Yes, I knew, you had meanings,
Everyone explains…you would have…
But, I never wanted to know,
I never wanted to ask,
I didn’t ask…
You would have told.

When you said those,
I knew, things wouldn’t be the same,
I knew, we wouldn’t be the same,
And we’re never the same,
Yes, we’re changed.

Through pretensions and clowning
We tried our smiles.
We held on to each other, hoping,
Watching each other narrowly,
With suspicion and distrust
Denying reality and our states
And deceiving the relationship.

It’s all over now,
To turn back is hard,
Moving forward is…tough
And beyond our prospect,
Now, here we are, hurt and sore,
Not trusting time, or the world.
Sideways, we’re divided selves,
We look away from each other,
With a hope for a newer awakening.

A Dream Awakened

December 29, 2007

He sat on a slab of rock under a pine tree overlooking a river meandearing down the valley. He looked at a bird, perched high on the branch of an oak tree, its song melodious in the warm afternoon sun. Why did he feel he could understand the bird’s song? Why did he feel he could understand the language of nature that surrounded and protected him?

The wind blew differently. The leaves rustled differently. The whole landscape was different. He felt that the whole world was renewed and awakened from a dream, a pleasant dream that he was afraid to wake up.

He sat still, gazing fixedly at the awakened world. He was afraid he would lose the glory of the moment.

The river was silent, the wind calm. An indescribable feeling cooled his mind.

Peaceful.

Truth and History

December 28, 2007

Truth’s just an opinion…so is history.

A Twig of Smile

December 26, 2007

‘Kill me!’ says a man to a man.

The man just shudders and walks away. Then the man, desperate, looks around for clues, for possibilities how his hope would be fulfilled, how his despair would be mutilated. Pained to the bone, he walks down the path surrounded by trees.

Soft breeze soothing his face, he whistles unconsciously mimicking the singing of birds that sing along with his whistling. A small smile runs along his lips brightening his face. Not aware it’s happiness he feels, he looks sadly at the world around him. A happy man himself, he’s often saddened by the world surrounding him. He asks a million questions. He gets no answer.

Wind blows hard and sends off a tiny branch ripping from a tree. The branch hits the man. He falls down, the branch struck on his chest. He sees the sun above. The smile dies in his eyes.

Merry X-MAS

December 25, 2007

To all those who believe in Santa Clauses and Christmas Trees and Gifts and Giving and Receiving and Holidays and Beer and Wine and Food and Drinks…

Merry Christmas and Season’s Greetings…

Wish everyone Joys and Success, Love and Peace, Good Fortune and Prosperity…

Best Wishes!

Group Portrait with Drunkards

December 24, 2007

I stood in the midst of a hundred and eight drunkards, their conversation floating around me like dreams, sucking me into whirlpool of confusion and dread. For once, I was the loneliest man alive. I looked around and saw familiar faces, unfamiliar gathering; familiar voices, unfamiliar conversation. How I dreaded the moment!

Then I began to think, ‘why am I a part of this league that is beyond my willingness to indulge my senses?’ I looked around and saw faces, sad and withered with ages of pain, wearing masks of smiles complimenting each other with consolation joys. I looked around and found my own sadness pooled in their smiles.

‘Give me a drink,’ shouted a man at the counter behind a tree decorated with lights, ‘and therein lies my happiness!’ I saw a couple of odd socks dangling all over the place. Everyone was wearing the same smile. The lights brightened their sadness.

Another man appeared at the counter and demanded the same drink of happiness. Clutching a glass of happiness, he disappeared into the crowd, laughing.

They all had their drinks. They had happiness or not, I knew not.

Laughter clasped like thunder, the sound of which still ring in my ears. Laughter – just empty noise devoid of joys. Laughter – threads of sounds measured in beads of sadness.

Their laughter only pained me further. I found no joys in hollow crackling of rhythmic noise booming along with the loudspeakers. I felt only sadness – pure as a baby’s cry.

They were seeking pleasure. I was looking for the meaning of life.

Truth and Fiction

December 23, 2007

‘I cried and cried. I remember!’ I lied.

Who would remember one’s birthday? I don’t remember it myself. Why would others?

The truth: I’m growing older…
The Fact: I’m old…but young at heart.
Fiction: I’m still young…
Illusion: I’m still the same…
Reality: I’m growing old…

Anyway, how many years till someone or some of the people would say, ‘Oh, he was a good man…’ and celebrate my death day by feasting endlessly for twenty one days and beyond (till forty nine days, if budget permits).

Oh, I’m old. I’m an old man. I rant like an old man…childishly.